Thursday, September 04, 2003
haiz..today was a sad day for mi.. frens told mi smthing that i nv wanted to noe.. cried during sci lesson..really wan to break down n cry.. but cant.. tot im really happie but i seem to b wrong.. my life don seem to b goin well... so many things i haf to noe.. so many things i haf to understand..so many things i haf to accept when i nv wanted to..so many things i haf to learnt..so many memory i haf to forget..it seem to b little but its v hard to complete them...im so confused rite now.. i really wan to break down.. always thinkin if the thing im doin now its correct or wat.. scared of this n that.. begin not to trust any of my frens.. scared they might betray mi.. n do smthing bad behind my back.. scared they r using mi.. im scared og so many things.. i scared to get into another relationship.. scared to fall in love.. coz the person i always love nv feel the same way..im always the one getin hurt.. im the one hu haf to go through all this.. do i haf a choices? i was walkin home today after my swimmin..i was thinkin wat should i do.. can make my life much more happier..my life seem to b so miserable..im tired of my life agn..juz lyk last tm.. feel so restless... do ever wish to make ppl sad.. nv wish to make ppl worry for mi.. i don noe wat m i thinkin.. don noe wat is goin on..im goin crazy..! so many things happen in one tm.. juz need tm to accept that i gonna to forget her.. juz haf to accept that the person i lyk might fall for my frens..[if i shouldn sat this im sorrie~] or anything.. i don noe la..~! i juz hate myslef~! i hate this world i hate everything~!!!!-confused in everything-
{/9:00 PM}
count on it .
